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Wikipedia:Featured list candidates/Assistant Commandant of the Marine Corps/archive1

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The following is an archived discussion of a featured list nomination. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the article's talk page or in Wikipedia talk:Featured list candidates. No further edits should be made to this page.

The list was promoted by Matthewedwards 08:08, 18 July 2009 [1].

Assistant Commandant of the Marine Corps

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Nominator(s): Kumioko (talk) 03:14, 4 July 2009 (UTC)[reply]
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I am nominating this for featured list because I believe it meets all the criteria. Unfortunately there are limited sources for this article and limited information known or printed about it so the referencs are a little lean. Other than that I think its good.Kumioko (talk) 03:14, 4 July 2009 (UTC)[reply]

Resolved comments from Truco
Oppose from Truco (talk · contribs)
General
  • Dabs, external links check out fine.
Lead
  • Because ref#1 verifies the entire first paragraph, I would just have it cited once at the end of the paragraph instead of numerous times. (Alt. you can make ref#1 a general reference)
  • The lead needs to be expanded to summarize the list itself. (Eg. First ACMC, most AMCMCs of a certain ranking, etc.) Yes each section has a prose about the list, but the lead needs to have a brief summary of that.
Assistants to the Commandant of the Marine Corps
  • Before the official title of "Assistant Commandant of the Marine Corps" was adopted in 1946 the title of the position was known as the Assistant to the Commandant and prior to 1918, only a billet "Duty in the office of the Commandant". -- 1)Comma after 1946 2)Per consistency, add quotes around Assistant to the Commandant 3)the last part seems a bit awkward, wouldn't it be only a billet known as the "Duty in the office of the Commandant"
  • The first of the Assistants to the Commandant was Lieutenant Colonel Eli K. Cole who assumed the position April 29, 1911. -- 1)Comma before who 2)+on before the date
  • You need to be consistent with the formatting of the dates, either (Day Month, Year) or (Month Day, Year)
  • From April 29, 1911 to October 16, l946 19 men were assigned to assist the commandant including 5 that eventually went on to become commandant themselves; John A. Lejeune, Wendell C. Neville, Ben H. Fuller, John H. Russell, Jr. and Alexander A. Vandegrift. -- 1)Comma before 19 men 2)The semicolon should be a colon.
Assistant Commandants of the Marine Corps
  • In 1946 Congress established the position of "Assistant Commandants of the Marine Corps" and since then 31 men have held the position. -- 1)Comma after 1946 2)Comma before 31 men
  • Four other as well as 4 others; Randolph M. Pate, Leonard F. Chapman, Jr., Robert H. Barrow and Paul X. Kelley. -- Four others as well as 4 others (I think you can spot the error)
  • As with the Commandant the Assistant Commandant of the Marine Corps is appointed by the President based on advice and consent of the Senate and once appointed will received the grade of General. -- 1)Comma after As with the Commandant 2)Comma before and after and once appointed 3)received -> receive
  • When there is a vacancy in the office of Commandant of the Marine Corps, or during the absence or disability of the Commandant the Assistant Commandant of the Marine Corps shall perform the duties of the Commandant until a successor is appointed or the absence or disability ceases. -- Comma before shall
References

Support, all issues resolved. Dabomb87 (talk) 16:30, 17 July 2009 (UTC)[reply]

Resolved issues, Dabomb87 (talk)
Comments from Dabomb87 (talk · contribs)
Done. Although I think I need to expand some there is at least something there. --Kumioko (talk) 03:37, 14 July 2009 (UTC)[reply]
I think maybe you overdid it a little bit... :P "a photo of XXX" probably would have sufficed, although I never noticed before just how the ACMC (and the CMC) were all white males. bahamut0013wordsdeeds 04:56, 14 July 2009 (UTC)[reply]
Actually, "Photo of XXX" is actually what not to say when specifying alt text. Dabomb87 (talk) 13:37, 14 July 2009 (UTC)[reply]
Maybe I over did it a little but they how do you descibe a picture in a dozen words and have it be descriptive enough to be meaningful? The problem is if I just put something like "Image of a man in his military uniform" what does that tell you if you can't see it? Nothing, and you'll have a lot of pictures with the same text not descriptive enough to tell them apart. As I see it this is one of the problems with putting alt text on the image, which I agree with, is putting eoungh to make it useful but not too much without POV. Because we are dealing with a list of individuals, all white, all in a similar style military uniform, if I didn't put the names in the description how would you know which is which?. --Kumioko (talk) 13:55, 14 July 2009 (UTC)[reply]
  • "Prior to"-->Before (multiple occurences)
Done --Kumioko (talk) 15:02, 13 July 2009 (UTC)[reply]
  • "The Assistant Commandant today is appointed by"
done --Kumioko (talk) 03:38, 13 July 2009 (UTC)[reply]
  • "As of July 3, 2008, the current Assistant Commandant is James F. Amos."
Done. --Kumioko (talk) 03:38, 13 July 2009 (UTC)[reply]
  • "No records exist prior to the outbreak of World War I about this position, possibly because the Commandant likely had only administrative staff and no deputy." The inline citation provided does not back up "possibly because the Commandant likely had only administrative staff and no deputy". I'm assuming this is sourced from the general reference?
Yes. --Kumioko (talk) 03:38, 13 July 2009 (UTC)[reply]
  • "The first of the Assistants to the Commandant was Lieutenant Colonel Eli K. Cole"-->The first Assistant to the Commandant was Lieutenant Colonel Eli K. Cole
Done --Kumioko (talk) 15:03, 13 July 2009 (UTC)[reply]
  • "were assigned to assist the commandant" Comma after here.
Done --Kumioko (talk) 15:02, 13 July 2009 (UTC)[reply]
  • "including 5 that eventually went on to become"-->including 5 who went on to become
Done --Kumioko (talk) 15:02, 13 July 2009 (UTC)[reply]
  • "was the first to hold the billet and eventually went on to become Commandant, as well as 4 others" "4"-->four
Done--Kumioko (talk) 15:02, 13 July 2009 (UTC)[reply]
I checked that. It looks like a DAB link but its not. If you check the page it links to the first paragraph explains it. If you prefer I can delink it though. --Kumioko (talk) 19:58, 14 July 2009 (UTC)[reply]
Delink or wikitionary link would be fine. Dabomb87 (talk) 23:53, 14 July 2009 (UTC)[reply]
Done. I dee-linked it! --Kumioko (talk) 00:32, 15 July 2009 (UTC)[reply]

Sources look good. Dabomb87 (talk) 01:42, 13 July 2009 (UTC)[reply]

The above discussion is preserved as an archive. Please do not modify it. No further edits should be made to this page.
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