Talk:Innocent (Taylor Swift song)

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GA Review

This review is transcluded from Talk:Innocent (Taylor Swift song)/GA1. The edit link for this section can be used to add comments to the review.

Reviewer: K. Peake (talk · contribs) 07:09, 9 October 2022 (UTC)

Good Article review progress box Criteria: 1a. prose () 1b. MoS () 2a. ref layout () 2b. cites WP:RS () 2c. no WP:OR () 2d. no WP:CV () 3a. broadness () 3b. focus () 4. neutral () 5. stable () 6a. free or tagged images () 6b. pics relevant () Note: this represents where the article stands relative to the Good Article criteria. Criteria marked are unassessed

Hopefully I can do this in full today! --K. Peake 07:09, 9 October 2022 (UTC)

Infobox and lead

• Infobox looks good!
• The pop ballad part should be merged with the lyrics sentence; merge the production and wrote in response sentences instead earlier on
• "Swift wrote "Innocent" in" → "Swift wrote the song in"
• Wikilink 2009 MTV Video Music Awards
• "claiming him to be "innocent"" → "claiming him to hold innocence"
• "Swift performed "Innocent" live" → "Swift performed it live" also, this should be the penultimate sentence of the last para
• "of putting the controversy behind them." → "of putting the controversy behind her and West."
• Place the critical reception sentence first in the second para

• I placed the charts before the critical reception to follow the article's flow. Ippantekina (talk) 01:58, 15 October 2022 (UTC)

• ""Innocent" peaked at" → "the song peaked at" but place Billboard Hot 100 first per this being Swift's native country
• "some viewed it as" → "some viewed the song as"

Background and writing

• Wikilink 2009 MTV Video Music Awards on the img text
• Remove American singer-songwriter introduction since that is not needed when already provided in the lead
• "on her third studio album," → "on her third studio album"
• "in real life could not." → "in real life but did not."
• Only refer to West as rapper because that's his main identity
• "former U.S. president" → "former US President"
• "was a song that took her longer to finish than" → "took longer for her to finish than" to be less wordy

Music and lyrics

• ""Innocent" is a gentle pop ballad in which" → "Musically, "Innocent" is a gentle pop ballad, in which"
• Mention the additional instruments included per the liner notes
• "thanks to Swift's use" → "due to Swift's use"
• "growing up now/ Who" → "growing up now/Who" per the source
• Wikilink imagery
• Invoke [8] after the "firefly catchin' days" sentence, as any with a quote needs a citation
• I'm not sure if "with them" is needed since they is already used after the comma
• "It mourns the loss of" → "The song mourns the loss of"
• [13] should solely be invoked at the end of the para because it is not needed separately for the last two sentences
• "as 32, being West's" → "as 32, West's"

Release and live performance

• "Swift performed "Innocent" live" → "Swift debuted "Innocent" with a live performance"
• "Addressing the Kanye West controversy" → "Addressing the West controversy"
• Wikilink acoustic guitar
• "She said the performance" → "Swift said the performance"
• "at the MTV awards" → "at the awards show"
• "she wanted to do with the album" → "she wanted to do with"
• "at that moment."" → "at that moment"." per MOS:QUOTE
• Wikilink lead single
• Are you sure the word commercially is needed for the release? Also, the song is not mentioned by that source nor is the date
• Swap the Billboard Hot 100 and Canadian Hot 100 around, also both refs should be at the end of the sentence
• The source does not mention the song specifically being left off the tour's set list

Reception and aftermath

• "some viewed it" → "some viewed the song"
• "disguised as 'forgiveness' ", and" → "disguised as 'forgiveness'", and"

• MOS:QWQ. Ippantekina (talk) 01:50, 15 October 2022 (UTC)

• "and called Swift hypocritical" → "and saw Swift as hypocritical"
• Remove pipe on New York
• "maternal light: "she really plays" → "maternal light, "really play[ing]"
• "to a baby."" → "to a baby"." per MOS:QUOTE
• "'the better person' "." → "'the better person'"."
• "public image as an innocent "America's Sweetheart"" → "innocent public image as "America's Sweetheart""
• "into 2016 when she" → "into 2016, when she"
• "controversy in which West released the single "Famous", which included" → "controversy, in which West released the single "Famous", including"
• Steve Hyden → Steven Hyden with the wikilink
• HitFix should not be italicised, also mention the reviewer gave the song a B grade
• "its "beautiful" lyrics but" → "its "beautiful" lyrics, but"
• Pipe CMT to CMT (American TV channel)
• "manner and highlighted her" → "manner, and he highlighted her"

Credits and personnel

• Use {{spaced ndash}} so there is the right space between credits and personnel

Charts

• Pipe Country Digital Song Sales to Hot Country Songs

• MOS:NOTBROKEN. Ippantekina (talk) 01:59, 15 October 2022 (UTC)

References

• Copyvio score looks strong at 24.2%!!!
• WP:OVERLINK of ProQuest on refs 6, 7, 12 and 19

• OVERLINK says repeated links in references do not constitute overlink; I remember this issue has been mentioned and resolved on my previous GANs as well. Ippantekina (talk) 01:57, 15 October 2022 (UTC)

• Cite MTV News as publisher instead on refs 9 and 16, only wikilinking on the first instance
• Add url-access subscription to ref 15
• Cite CBS News as publisher instead on ref 18
• WP:OVERLINK of Billboard on refs 21 and 36
• WP:OVERLINK of Slant Magazine on ref 26
• Cite The Ringer as publisher instead on ref 27
• Cite BBC Music as publisher instead on ref 31
• Cite HitFix as publisher instead on ref 33
• Cite NJ.com as publisher instead on ref 34

• For online sources, see MOS:TITLE ("Do not abuse incorrect template parameters (e.g. by putting the work title in |publisher= or |via=) in an attempt to avoid italicizing digital sources.") Unless the online source is a database (like ProQuest), I italicize all online sources that contain original content. Ippantekina (talk) 01:57, 15 October 2022 (UTC)

• listen.tidal.com → Tidal on ref 35, citing as publisher instead and piping to Tidal (service), also fix MOS:CAPS issues with the title

• Actually the credits are the musicians of the whole album; I unfortunately don't have the credits for this specific song, so I removed it. Ippantekina (talk) 01:57, 15 October 2022 (UTC)

Sources

• Good

Final comments and verdict

•  On hold until all of the issues are fixed; nice work on this one! --K. Peake 19:19, 9 October 2022 (UTC)

  Hello, thanks for the review. Except where I responded above, I have addressed your comments. Let me know if the article needs more work. Please keep in mind that I unfortunately could not get back to Wiki after the weekend. Cheers, Ippantekina (talk) 02:01, 15 October 2022 (UTC)

  Just found this nomination. Currently working to help the article meet the criteria. May take a day or two. aaronneallucas (talk) 03:11, 16 October 2022 (UTC).

  Aplucas0703 Thanks for stepping in, what's missing is the live performance sentence being moved in the lead, the comma before third studio album in the first section being removed, mention of additional instruments and why has personnel been removed? --K. Peake 10:28, 3 November 2022 (UTC)

  @Kyle Peake I'll check on it as soon as possible, but it might be a day or two. aaronneallucas (talk) 12:55, 3 November 2022 (UTC)

  @Kyle Peake or @Ippantekina, do either of you have anything on additional instruments and personnel that I can use to improve the article? aaronneallucas (talk) 18:06, 13 November 2022 (UTC)

  Ippantekina Restore the personnel section that was there before, mention the additional instruments in prose, move the live performance to where I suggested previously in the lead and remove the comma for third studio album in the body. --K. Peake 21:07, 13 November 2022 (UTC)

  The credits from Tidal are for the whole album and not individual tracks, thus I removed them. For the remaining points, could Aplucas0703 take them over as I'm unavailable atm? Thanks very much, Ippantekina (talk) 04:13, 14 November 2022 (UTC)

  Ippantekina That would be acceptable; as long as someone fixes the remaining issues, I am not fussed who it is! --K. Peake 08:33, 14 November 2022 (UTC)

  Apparently the other editor has gone inactive... so here I am, stepping in again. All should be addressed now. Thank you for your patience. Kyle Peake-- Ippantekina (talk) 03:35, 26 November 2022 (UTC)

  ✓ Pass now, took a while and I did some copy editing, but we got here! --K. Peake 10:12, 26 November 2022 (UTC)